Det same som du

SAMSUNG

Det same som du

 

Vi kan møtast

og sjå kvarandre skine

gjennom

og ut på andre sio

Har du møtt auge

som ikkje flakkar

Har du møtt hjarte

som takkar

deg

i innpust

og utpust

Har du klemt nokon lenge

utan å sleppe først

ute

til å rekkje fram handa

Kjenne du gnisten frå eit anna

menneske

når dei ser deg

ser dei ikkje

det same

som du

 

-detonatord

Cold Case

SAMSUNG

Cold Case

I let myself feel
for as long as needed
even though
my ego is down
feeling defeated
discussion´s heated
inside of me
ego determined
to turn off
the light in me

can´t reach down
with my analyzing mind
it´s exactly what
my emotions hide behind
at the same time
I can´t remember
what I can´t find
and I can´t heal
what I can´t feel

I have to face
something my memory erased
lost in the maze of my own chase for days
not realising it´s a cold case

I let myself feel
for as long as needed
but now I am empty
feeling depleted
stuck in a loop
mistakes are repeated
I can´t remember
what I deleted

and I think that´s why
my feelings are deluded
a painful trauma
my memory excluded
I can´t go on
´cause the only way
is through it
feeling the pain
is the only way
to do it
but I got stuck
in the brain
and I blew it

once again

I have to face
something my memory erased
lost in the maze of my own chase for days
not realising it´s a cold case

 

-detonatord

Treet

SAMSUNG

Treet

 

Vi skaper stemninger

som bryter ned gamle demninger

ser føler og lever

uten et filter av hemninger

ser gjennom et tre som

bøyer seg ner i takk mot bakken

en tanke i månens sølvmanke av

tusen som eg sanker

greiner

forgreiner

rein dråpe av ærlighet

og bittert sinn forvitrer

smuldrer og smitter ikkje

snakker og sukker ikkje

får føttene fri til å danse

det er plutselig tusenvis av løvblader

i én transe

 

-detonatord

Every Feeling

SAMSUNG

Every feeling

Is it just a thought
Obstructing my breathing
Or is it a feeling
Pleading with me
To listen in
Can’t be present
When not listening
Honestly
I’m escaping
The fact that I’m faking
With my soul at stake
Every time I take
A shortcut to pleasure
Because I can’t take
The pressure
From
Every emotional concussion

Instead I get
Caught up inside
Internal discussions
Mental repercussions
Calling me back
Telling myself
I’m deserving
of the attack

Purposely
Losing track
Lacking contact
With my true core
Breathing less
Thinking more
Avoiding whatever
My feelings have
In store
Afraid I’ll explode
If I open that door
Or maybe I fear
That I’ll disappear
Dissipating
Cause I can’t
Admit that
I’m hating

I lost the feeling riding it
Abiding by my need to analyse the feed of thoughts, it got me, but emotion is the motion in writing, enlightening is a feeling, of light towards the ceiling, opening the crown sealing, descending down into the veins
Anticipating the moment it gains
weight into every cell
Animating my body’s empty shell
But it’s not about feeling well
It’s about feeling it well
When you allow your Presence
You are honest
In essence
Grief suppressed in your chest masked like being mad
And hate repressed unable to digest
That you are sad
How can you be real now
If you ran from every
Feeling that you had?

 

-detonatord

Maskespillet

strbarm-kopi2

Maskespillet

 

usynlig god flink snill og uskyldig

det er masken som skjuler at eg er ugyldig

tøff og kul hard punk og promiskuøs

eg trodde eg fikk bekreftelse

hvis eg var løs

lå inntil én til

mens hjertet mitt frøs

flink pike forvandlet

til enda en tøs

 

eg spilte ingen rolle

så egoet tok over

eg ville være meg

men fulgte maskespillets lover

ALT for å unngå

sanne følelser

og skam

men no vet eg at

når eg møter det

så skifter eg ham

 

skam e det verste

å gå inn i

og virkelig føle

no tar eg det

med hornene

uten å nøle

eg møter deg på gaten

og begynner å brøle

 

-detonatord

The Labyrinth

alvik

The labyrinth

hate it
neglect your demons
or hide
you decide
half life
or being alive
.
when the door closes
it spirals down
endlessly in circles
and now you´re descending
to the bottom line
to that moment
when you broke your spine
to all that grief
that you left behind
.
you see
how can you get up
when you have no backing
the ground is gone
when your dignity is lacking
.
I looked up instead of in
tried to breath
but the air was too thin
I looked up longing to fly
but wings don´t carry a broken spine
I stopped looking
wanting to die
I looked as though
everything was fine
.
you see
hate it
neglect you demons
or hide
you decide
half life
or being alive
.
and you are not even crying
the pain is so deep
it feels like dying
feel it
feel it now
or you won´t stop lying
feel it
feel your back
and start flying
.

.

-detonatord

Integrity

SAMSUNG

INTEGRITY

My serenity
was kindled
through my
hard earned integrity
Learned by severity
Churned in scarcity
of love, thinking I was good
A misinterpreted longing
to be understood
I gave away my power
thinking that I should
give up everything
that could
reveal me
I thought this
denial would
heal me
Feel me
I didn’t know
this way
you could
steal me
Still hiding
when I wanted
you to see me
All the while
I had to
be the one
to free me
Balancing
light and dark
to be me
.
To put up
boundaries
might seem aggressive
A massive change
to your surroundings
They can’t see
the mountain
you are mounting
Your life is up hill
counteracting
past beliefs
And still
for every boundary
you maintain
You’re back is straightened
by the integrity
you gain
.
They say
you shouldn’t have
aggressive behavior
But if you’re lacking
back bone
anger is your saviour
The darkness is there
though under
suppression
Without recognition you might
explode in confession
Or you’re like me
You implode by the pressure
to drown in self loathing
beyond any measure
.
You’re climbing
the ladder
of uncertainty
Life came without
warranty
Guaranteed
you’ve got to
fight for your integrity
But every step
is worth it
Like self worth
you have to birth it
with complete love
For your wildness
turns into the
most incredible kindness

.

-detonatord

Waiting

SAMSUNG

Waiting

.

in those minutes waiting

for the train

like I´m alive for the first time

I am

part of a life stream

life´s dream

looking at the stars

created on

a spotted floor

being made

by and by

hundreds of people

and ghosts

reaping what they sow

and the roof is

letting go

of the snow

falling into soft piles

becoming water

melting

like heaven´s daughter

descending

just watching

the dynamics

between

destruction and mending

.
.

-detonatord